One of the ways I frustrate myself the most: I have such a hard time finishing things. Time commitments, projects, goals, little daily tasks. Pretty much everything in my life. I'm always fighting myself to actually finish something. I am the type of person to get really excited about an idea, build up a lot of momentum at the start, and burn out too quickly.
My house is cluttered with unfinished projects. My purses are full of lists that rarely get used.
Wow- What a depressing way to start out a post: something I have always disliked about myself. It's ok though, I'm getting better. Slowly- but I am. The most important part: I am recognizing the fact that I have made progress.
Because of this struggle, I was never one to make New Year's Resolutions. Why bother? I'd forget about them that same day.
Well, last year I decided that I wanted a change. So I thought about a small acheivable list for the year. This was it:
1. After many many months of dreaming, making lists of words and ideas, and asking friends and family members their opinion; I finally came up with the name "
the Dainty Woods" as my business name. I love it♥
2. After I came up with my business name, I could finally open
my Etsy shop. As of now, it's a little shop. But it makes me happy knowing that it's full of things that I created and that other people will get to enjoy them.
3. This one is not crossed off because I don't feel like I accomplished this goal. I know a little piano, but just enough to play a few very simple songs. However, I have a bad habit of "playing by ear". When I was younger, I would teach myself songs by slowly reading the notes. But once I memorized the sound, I could play it without actually reading anything. I want to be able to sit down and read music. Or at least chords. My husband is an amazing pianist and we have one in our home. It would be easy to learn, I just need to make more of an effort.
4. Last february, I took an amazing class called Indie Business 2.0! It was taught by
Elsie,
Jill, and
Leigh-Ann. At the time, I was in the beginning stages of dreaming up my business, what it was about and what to call it. I had no idea where to start and no idea what I was doing. This class was so informative and fun! My teachers are all great business women and I admire all of them so much.
After struggling to finish high school, thinking I wasn't smart [not true], and having low self esteem, I was not ready for starting any kind of college courses. At the same time, I discovered that at my jobs [ I had 3], I thrived. People saw leadership skills in me that, at the time, I wasn't able to see in myself. My bosses saw my good work ethic- I was known for being a hard worker. I also remember discovering that feeling of being productive. It felt so good to finish the simplest things like deep cleaning the oven or organizing the cupboards. I had finished something. All of these positive things made me feel good and they were easy. School was not, so I didn't enroll anywhere. After years of just working and thinking school wasn't for me, I found myself in a place I didn't want to be. I saw the food service industry as my only career option and that was not ok.
I still struggle with the fear of not finishing once my classes get hard, or falling into the lie of believing that I'm not smart enough. I didn't want these things to stand in my way, so I signed up for the best [non-intimidating] thing I could think of- a fun class about working my dream job, taught by my favorite bloggers... ok! Indie business got me excited about learning and about the idea of going back to school.
5. I am still at Starbucks. Philip and I decided that I needed to stay there so that we could keep saving and getting our health benefits. It's the easiest option right now. But we've been scheming up a new plan that has to do with my work for the next three months...we'll see how it goes :)
6. I am so happy that I am married to someone who is patient with me and loves me no matter what. I am a compulsive spender and a horrible saver. I always wanted to change this and never knew how. This was really hard for me, once we got married and I was all of a sudden spending someone else's hard earned money. I hated thinking about all of the hours Philip spent at his stressful job, commuting back and fourth, just for me to blow it on something I "needed" when I saw it at Target. Lame. But when I saw it in the store, that moment, I didn't think about all of those things- I just had to have it!
We have been on the cash/envelope system for a while now. We're not perfect at it, but we have gotten much much better with our money, and I am so grateful for this!
7. I didn't take any formal sewing classes from anyone. But I did use needle and thread instead of that glue gun I love so much. I sewed instead of glued on many many projects and hair pieces. I was very proud of myself for doing this and thought I deserved to cross it off my list. I won't get better at it if I don't try. I finally got a sewing machine for Christmas and am excited to learn how to use that as well.
♥
That was a little more about me. It feels a little funny writing these things, but hopefully it will get easier. The blogs I like the most are the ones that are written with honesty and sincerity. I want this little blog to be like that for others when they read it. I want to write with intention and to be as honest as I can.
I will work on my 2011 goals tomorrow and post them as soon as they are done. I am off to bed. Night night.
